More and more, I’m starting to embrace all that I’ve done in the past…perhaps I can inspire you to do the same.

As an example, several years ago I was working in what seemed like the ultimate jail – a cubicle. I loathed the job although I loved the people. It was the feeling of having to be there and work on projects that meant less than nothing to me that drove me nearly insane. I felt I was wasting my life, and although I was offered promotions due to my professionalism and work ethic, I dreaded the thought of spending my whole working life there. As you may guess, everyone thought I was crazy for even considering giving up a ‘good thing.’

At the time, I swore I’d move beyond that horrid cubicle and I began by making a list, once I learned the nifty trick of defining what I want by being clear on what I DIDN’T want.

If you’d like to do this exercise, here’s how to do it effectively. Using life’s work as an example, start by listing your job from hell: everything you would (or do) absolutely hate about a job. I still have my list, and although I have utterly changed since then (more about that later), you might find it helpful, or at least amusing :

• Get up early and/or work late
• No appreciation
• Yelled at all the time for others’ mistakes (or mine)
• Everyone dumps their stuff on you
• No food available
• Time clock
• No benefits
• Dark or windowless area
• No radio or ventilation
• Fluorescent lighting and a ticking clock
• Molest-y men all around
• Gossipy people
• No chance for advancement

This exercise did not take into account many horrifying working conditions in other areas of the world, of course. It served well as a jumping off point for me to determine what I did want at the time. Here’s the list I made of my ‘ideal’ job, based on the opposites of the first list and without thinking too much about it:

• Wake up on my own time and only work late if I want to
• Able and encouraged to use my mistakes to learn – not blamed for anything not mine
• Being understood, empathized with
• Only my duties
• My choice of food readily available
• No one watching or counting my hours
• Benefits – health, dental, prescription, eyes somehow covered – no worries
• Windows, sunlight
• Music, fresh air, contact with people and world
• Indirect and pleasant task-oriented lighting
• Able to get absorbed in work without noticing time
• Co-workers or men in the business whose respect is given, earned: obvious equality
• Career-oriented, positive and intelligent people
• Advance as earned – my choice

The Creative Leap

After analyzing this information for a while, I decided that going into real estate as a salesperson would fulfill these desires nicely. I had a small daughter and wanted more flexibility, and my Mom had been in real estate years earlier. I also had a marketing and business background and valued integrity, professionalism and doing an excellent job for clients I cared about. Real estate seemed the ideal vocation for me. I went through the intense training and quit my job: I leapt.

The Results

Here’s where I admit to failure. hated real estate, and I mean hated it. I found that my clients didn’t appreciate me, my officemates and other Realtors either had no ambition or were very competitive, and I didn’t like ‘selling’ to people at all. We were charged with approaching ‘For Sale by Owner’ households on a daily basis, and it left me cowering in my bed more than once, despite a wealth of sales material I read and listened to. I just wasn’t able to get my authentic self across. Once I had clients,  I loved them and treated them almost as I would my own family, and because I cared so much I would not be pushy with people. This caused them to either be wishy-washy, to walk all over me or to be pushed into things by some other unscrupulous agent.

There is much more to the story than this, but suffice to say real estate was NOT what I thought it was, and I had been fooled by the happy Realtor commercials.

I took such a risk with this new career path that it was four grueling years before I could admit to myself that it was failing me, and me it. I wanted it to work, but I was desperately unhappy, and on top of that the flexibility I thought I’d enjoy was definitely not there. My daughter’s most common complaint was about me dragging her to appointments, and that sure wasn’t quality time!

Fast Forward

I would not give up my experience in real estate, OR in any other job I performed and disliked - including the original instigator - for the world. Those experiences have made me who I am, and have informed the decisions I’ve made since then. From our experiences we can choose to define and then refine what it is that we want.

I am now working at my beautiful desk in my home, writing about things I am passionate about and enjoying my dinner while listening to jazz…with a beautiful view outside and the ability to stop and start whenever I wish. I’m in absolute heaven!

My central passion has become to help others look around and realize they can do the same thing, and it can be distilled down to 3 simple steps, no matter the subject:

1. DEFINE what you want, and take steps to experience it in some way
2. REFINE as you learn from your new experiences
3. ACHIEVE your dreams!

Without this creative, life- and happiness-affirming process, I think I would die from boredom – my worst nightmare.

I hope I can inspire you to new heights of achievement in your own life, and if you have any questions, don’t hesitate to contact me. Life is fleetingly short, and we are all in it together. Let’s make the most of it and make it spectacular!

P.S. If you’re feeling inspired to embrace your power, here’s a little boost in the form of an article by Steve Pavlina…be forewarned it’s not always easy, but it IS always rewarding in the end.