The Breathing Prosperity blog

Peace on Earth…and good will to all men. That’s how the song goes, right? Have you ever thought about that, and what it means to you personally?

(If you’re wondering what this has to do with the concept of prosperity, it’s simple: we cannot enjoy financial or any other type of prosperity when there is violence or deep unrest in our lives. Our planet and its people are not truly prosperous when some of us are killing and hurting others. We are all hurting ourselves as long as deep psychic wounds remain unhealed, and as long as they are passed from generation to generation instead of being dealt with at the level of cause rather than symptom.)

Do you want peace on earth? The real question is, are you willing to offer good will to ALL MEN in order to make peace a reality?

‘Who, me?’ you may say. ‘It’s the other guys who are creating wars, and acting in violent ways, and destroying lives, families and futures. Not me – I am a peaceful, good person and I certainly want peace on earth. If only those other guys would smarten up…it’s so sad.’

Are There Really Bad Guys?

The truth is, most of us are raised to WANT to perpetrate violence in retaliation for perceived or actual offences. Whether we want to do it ourselves (to hurt another in return for something they’ve done to us), or we want others to do it for us (have the police or the army or the government ‘get’ the bad guys), we live in a ‘might is right’ society and we are raised to try and protect our own little interests. Rarely do we see those other guys as tender, complex and important human beings just like ourselves, who want only the best for their families and who will vow revenge should something happen to them.

What happens in your mind when you get cut off intentionally by someone in traffic? Are there certain people in your life who rub you the wrong way? Maybe there are even folks who hurt you deeply and who you cannot stand the sight or the thought of…and what about the selfish jerks in your life? When you think about these people, do you offer them good will? Does your mind instantly forgive and do you smile with patience and love at their antics, as you would a child whom you adore? If this describes you, and there are no situations in which you feel anger, resentment or bitterness towards another human being, you are a truly aware and highly conscious individual, and it is my honour to have you reading here. You bring light and peace to us all. For the rest of us, it’s time we looked inside ourselves for our contribution to the level of peace in this world we all share.

If it’s difficult to forgive small grievances, imagine the power of collective grievances and deep cultural and religious hatreds, held by thousands or millions of people, and fueled by mass buy-in. The challenge is not a small one, but the trick, I think, is to tackle it person by person. If each of us can recognize the tendency toward separation and violence in our own hearts when it arises, we can choose to rise above it and to BE better; more loving, more open, more patient and tolerant and curious.

When we feel rage or intolerance towards another, THAT is where peace gets killed. This planet is full of people…individuals just like you and I, and each of us contributes collectively to the consciousness of the whole. The anger we feel at another is just like anyone else’s anger, and it all adds up. When we wish to seek revenge – whether it’s a small revenge like getting someone back for insulting us, or a huge vendetta against another culture for hurting our family or ancestors – we participate in the anguish of humanity. We perpetuate it and we continue creating it.

Have there not been times when you have made mistakes, and times when you’ve said or done things which now make you cringe? When you look back at your younger years, are there situations you’d like to do over, or wish you had handled differently? Perhaps you’ve hurt people – intentionally or otherwise – and perhaps you’ve been stupid and callous and selfish…and somehow you still manage to think you’re a pretty good person. You’ve grown, you’ve learned and you hope others will forgive you. Don’t others deserve those same missteps and the same forgiveness? Isn’t that rocky path an essential part of being human? There is always a reason behind another’s behavior, and there is always room for change and growth.

When we forgive, when we see that we are all the same, when we understand the actions of another because we’ve been there or we can otherwise empathise, we begin the process of healing. We can become connected and see through the veil of separation, and can raise our children to see beyond culture and race and all the other borderlines which have existed for far too long. Thoughts of hatred and revenge, no matter how petty, are poisons to us, both inside and out.

As within, so without…as long as we keep looking outside of ourselves for the solution, we will never find it, and never create it. As soon as EACH OF US takes responsibility for accepting each other as we are, for being tolerant and loving and for fostering connections instead of separation, we will begin to create our cherished ideal of PEACE ON EARTH.

Photo credit: NASA

How many credit card offers have you received in the mail lately, despite the ‘financial crisis’ we are undergoing in North America? Just this year alone, I’ve had my various credit card limits increased by almost $15,000 without ever asking for it. This is tightening credit?…

With all the talk about errant companies lending money in excess to innocent people, how many individuals have you seen or heard of who stand up and say ‘Hey, our finances are OUR responsibility! Just because someone OFFERS us something doesn’t mean we have to take it!’… ? Not many, if my experiences are any indication of the norm. Like offering candy to a baby, what seems yummy at the time could be the worst thing for us, and we need to become much more discerning.

I’d like to talk about taking personal responsibility for your financial decisions, and about learning to make wise choices. It’s not going to be painful, except in initial phase of accepting past misalignments. Once you fully face and own how you’ve been behaving when it comes to money, it is liberating! It will restore hope to your weary soul, and allow your future to be as bright as you once hoped it would be.

So many people have been caught in this current credit crunch, and much of the blame does indeed fall on the shoulders of the banks and lending institutions who knew exactly what they were doing. However, what happened to personal responsibility? What happened to people making informed and intelligent decisions with their money and deciding, consciously, not to get in over their heads? Most people at banks are just salespeople, and many, many customers fall prey to their sales tactics every day – it’s true. Perhaps the best thing we can do for ourselves is to wise up and start thinking more for ourselves.

The challenge is especially difficult because the financial industry has traditionally thrived on the ignorance of its customers, and on subtle intimidation. Haven’t you noticed how you sometimes feel as if you know less than the ‘professional’ to whom you are speaking, so you are not always comfortable asking for clarification? Just trust me, I know what’s best for you, seems to be their message. Well, look at the mess this trust en masse has created!

When I was in Real Estate, I would tell every purchaser client that they may be wise not to take the highest mortgage offer their lender/s put forth. I noticed that lenders had the tendency to encourage people to spend the maximum amount they could qualify for, and this in turn put stars in people’s eyes when they saw the type of housing this could buy them. I’d take them to see properties in the ‘reasonable’ price range, and they would insist on seeing those at the very limit of what they’d pre-qualified for. Somehow there always seemed to be a noticeable difference, and they’d end up feeling that the lower-priced properties were horrible and convince themselves they ‘deserved’ the higher-priced ones. This is a deadly and subtle game of mental seduction, and instead of fulfilling dreams, as it first seems, it most often creates nightmares.

Almost invariably, I’d see people maxing out their mortgage capacity and becoming what I call ‘mortgage poor.’  Instead of wisely spending only what would be affordable for them on a monthly basis, they stretched as far as they could and put every last penny into the biggest, best property they could. Often the banks would not be forthcoming about the true closing costs, so luckily they’d have me to remind them about the lawyer’s fees, transfer taxes, etc.. What if I hadn’t? Even so, they’d leave no wiggle room for future surprises such as car trouble, extra groceries, kids’ braces or other contingencies. Can’t afford a vacation – got to pay the mortgage! Can’t afford to give to that charity – got to make the mortgage payment! This is no way to live, feeling the crunch all the time. It’s stressful and energy-sapping.

Here is an appalling example of how messed up our financial systems are: Recently we met a young woman who was visiting Canada from Australia. Before she even found a job, she went into the local branch of a national bank to open an account. While meeting with the representative, she was offered a credit card(!). As it turns out, this woman was head of a bank’s finance department back home in Australia and had taken a leave to travel…she had her priorities straight. She said to the rep, “I don’t even have a job! What are you doing offering me credit?”to which she was told that this was noooo problem – they were sure she would get one (based on what? How easy it is to get jobs these days?), and the credit could be used for anything she needed in the meantime. This from an absolute stranger to someone who just landed on our soil! As this woman related this story to us, I thought of several things. First, she was clever enough to question the offer and to decline it. She knew better and was not tempted by the lure of ‘free’ money, which credit is often sold as but definitely isn’t – it’s anything but, as people in debt will tell you. Secondly, she told us that in Australia this would NEVER have happened, and she was shocked at this lack of care in our system, and said she wasn’t at all surprised at the economic crisis if this was how easily money and credit are thrown around here. It’s good to know there are some countries with better systems and more foresight. Perhaps they will be the leaders of the future.

At the end of the day, we are all responsible for our individual decisions, and cannot place blame for circumstances outside of ourselves. Remember this: you are smart, and you’ve worked damn hard for your money. NO ONE cares more about it than you do (unless that care is directed toward putting some of it in their own pockets). This is not cynical but a reflection of how things work…your money is most precious to YOU, so learn how to keep it and stop giving it away. Be humble enough to ask questions until you are SURE you understand where your money will go in a potential investment. Be a willing student, always learning and never afraid to admit not knowing. Watch your bottom line grow as you proudly begin keeping your money in YOUR pocket!